(Intro) C Am F G, C Am G (x5) C Am F G My girlfriend looks like Peggy Mount C Am G What am I supposed to do? C Am F G I’m up the creek and never mind the paddle boy C Am G I haven’t even got a canoe. C Am F G, C Am G (x2) C Am F G I sold my soul to an Arctic Roll C Am G I went to hell on a red skidoo C Am F G I did the Shake’n’Vac and broke my fucking back C Am G And now my library books are nine weeks overdue. C Am F G, C Am G (x2) C Am F G Knock, knock, who’s there? C Am G The patron saint of Llandudno C Am F G The patron saint of Llandudno who? C Am G Tony Bastable. C Am F G You scratch my back and I’ll scratch yours C Am F G And I’ll be in heaven before you C Am F G I love you because you C Am G Look like Jim Reeves. C Am F G, C Am G (x2) C