The Nose Picking Song

	  		

verse 1 
C                                                  F      G       C 
Well I was wheelin' through a grocery store on the better side of town, 
                       Am                  D           G 
When I saw a lady in a halter top with her hair hangin' down.  
    F                                        C              Am 
Her shoes had prob'ly cost her more than the car I drive to work, 
                                          G 
She was a goddess in a bank vault full of clothes, 
        F                    G 
But she exposed herself as a human being  
       F           G           C 
when i saw she was pickin' her nose. 

verse 2 
C                                            F      G        C 
When I was at the bank this morning I had to answer nature's call, 
                               Am              D                   G 
Where they ushered me into the washroom at the end of the big wigs hall. 
           F                             C             Am 
And it was there I saw the president and keeper of the funds, 
                              G 
Standing at the sink until he froze. 
         F             G               F          G           C 
With his finger up his nostril where I saw he was pickin' his nose. 

Refrain 
C           F          G                     C               Am 
Well it's a sacred old tradition when you're drivin' in the car, 
F                   G            C              Am 
Behind the wheel at rush hour or headed for the bar.  
           F                G             C                Am 
And though man invented the Kleenex God invented the fingernail, 
      D                D7                   G              G7 
And regardless of your place in life you'll use it without fail. 
          F                 G                  C          Am 
Since the start of time without exception from Abraham to Moses, 
F                G                     F         G             C 
Winos heroes and average men have been constantly pickin' their noses. 

verse 3 
C                                            F     G        C 
Well I entered the church this evening I had guilt inside my heart, 
                 Am                    D            G 
So I ducked into confessions about the times I came apart. 
        F                                    C                 Am 
And the priest and I both bowed our heads in sorrow, guilt and shame. 
                                          G 
He said son you must repent 'til kindness grows. 
         F             G            F          G           C 
I peeked up during absolution and I saw he was pickin' his nose. 

Refrain 
C           F          G                     C               Am 
Well it's a sacred old tradition when you're drivin' in the car, 
F                   G            C              Am 
Behind the wheel at rush hour or headed for the bar.  
           F                G             C                Am 
And though man invented the Kleenex God invented the fingernail, 
      D                D7                   G              G7 
And regardless of your place in life you'll use it without fail. 
          F                 G                  C          Am 
Since the start of time without exception from Abraham to Moses, 
F                G                     F         G             C 
Winos heroes and average men have been constantly pickin' their noses. 

verse 4 
C                                            F      G        C 
Now I know the world seems full of men bein' better than the rest, 
                       Am                   D                   G 
And it's hard to see a welcome mat when you know you're a token guest. 
         F                               C            Am 
Ah but regardless of their money, power, influence or place, 
                                         G 
it is as certain as the wind that always blows.  
F              G                    F          G             C 
Nobody can withstand the urge to be constantly pickin' their nose. 

Refrain 
C           F          G                     C               Am 
Well it's a sacred old tradition when you're drivin' in the car, 
F                   G            C              Am 
Behind the wheel at rush hour or headed for the bar.  
F                           G           C            Am 
And though man invented the Kleenex God invented the fingernail, 
    D                  D7                   G              G7 
And regardless of your place in life you'll use it without fail. 
          F                 G                  C          Am 
Since the start of time without exception from Abraham to Moses, 
F                G                     F         G             C 
Winos heroes and average men have been constantly pickin' their noses.