ADVERTISING
Andy M. Stewart

The Humours Of Whiskey

Andy M. Stewart

Keyboard chords Easy level Easy
A                       E 
Let quacks and newspapers be cutting their capers 
    D          A           E 
Of curing the vapors the scratch and the gout 
       A                     E 
With medical potions, their serums and lotions 
   D             A                E         A 
Upholding their notions, they're mighty put out 

         A                       E 
Who can tell the true physic to all that's pathetic 
     A                          E 
And pitch to the divil, cramp, colic and spleen 
        A                      D          E 
You'll know it I think if you take a big drink 
           A                       E       A 
With your mouth to the brink of a jug of poteen 

    A            E           A             E 
So stick to the cratur' the best thing in nature 
     D            A           E            A 
For sinking your sorrows and raising your joys 
   E                     A           D 
Oh what botheration, no dose in the nation 
    D          A           E         A 
Can give consolation like whiskey me boys 

    A                  E 
No liquid cosmetic to lovers athletic 
    D         A         E 
Or bodies pathetic can give such a bloom 
     A                     E 
As sweet by the powers in gardens of flowers 
 D              A        E          A 
Gave their own bowers a darling perfume 

          A                     E 
And this liquid so rare if you willingly share 
       A                          E 
To be taking your hair when it's frizzled and dead 
        A                    D              E 
Oh the sod has the merit to yield the true spirit 
    A                            E               A 
So strong it will shake all the hairs from your head 

      A            E           A             E 
Then stick to the cratur' the best thing in nature 
     D            A           E            A 
For sinking your sorrows and raising your joys 
    E                        A          D 
Oh since its perfection, no doctor's direction 
      D              A           E         A 
Can cleanse the complexion like whiskey me boys 

         A                      E 
While a child in me cradle, me nurse with her ladle 
     D          A            E 
Was filling my mouth with a notion of pap 
        A                         E 
When a drop from her bottle fell into my throttle 
   D            A            E           A 
I stumbled and capered clean out of her lap 

         A                        E 
On the floor I lay crawlin' and screaming and bawling 
         A                      E 
'Til me mother and father were called to the fore 
     A                        D            E 
All sobbing and sighing they feared I was dying 
     A                     E          A 
But soon found I only was crying for more 

    A            E           A             E 
So stick to the cratur' the best thing in nature 
     D            A           E            A 
For sinking your sorrows and raising your joys 
    E                          A              D 
Oh lord how they'd chuckle if babes in their truckle 
      D          A          E         A 
They only could suckle on whiskey me boys 

            A                            E 
Through my youthful aggression, through times of depression 
    D              A              E 
My childhood's impression still clung to my mind 
        A                       E 
And at school or at college the basis of knowledge 
   D           A              E          A 
I never could gulp 'til with whiskey combined 

        A                       E 
And as older I'm growin' times ever bestowin' 
    A                  E 
On Erin's potation, a flavor so fine 
     A                        D            E 
And how e'er they lecture on jove and his nectar 
   A                     E         A 
Itself is the only true liquid divine 

    A            E           A             E 
So stick to the cratur' the best thing in nature 
     D            A           E            A 
For sinking your sorrows and raising your joys 
    E                              A            D 
Oh lord, 'tis the right thing for courting and fighting 
        D          A         E          A 
There's nowt so exciting as whiskey me boys 

          A                          E 
Come guess me this riddle: what beats pipes and fiddle 
       D           A           E 
What's hotter than mustard, and milder than cream? 
      A                              E 
What best wets your whistle? What's clearer than crystal 
D             A         E             A 
Sweeter than honey, and stronger than steam? 

A                                E 
What can make the dumb talk? What can make the lame walk? 
A                                  E          A 
What's the elixir of life and philosopher's stone? 
    A                   D                  E 
And what helped Mr. Brunel to dig the Thames tunnel? 
      A                     E       A 
Sure wasn't it whiskey from old Innishowen? 

     A           E           A           E 
So stick to the cratur the best thing in nature 
    D             A           E            A 
For sinking your sorrows and raising your joys 
    E                           A           D 
And boys, I'd half wonder if lightning and thunder 
     D             A            E          A 
Was made from the plunder of whiskey me boys 

     A                     E 
You maidens pathetic, with lovers athletic 
     D         A          E 
For liquid cosmetic, you can't beat the drop 
        A                      E 
With a glow to your cheek, it will make your heart leap 
       D       A           E           A 
It'll quiet a stallion or cure an old cob 

        A                        E 
At the mouth you would drool, be reduced to a fool 
       A                           E 
You'd kick up your heels and you'd peel to the buff 
           A                      D          E 
Then 'tis he'd be pathetic while you'd be athletic 
    A                     E            A 
If only you'd take a few drops of the stuff 

    A            E           A             E 
So stick to the cratur' the best thing in nature 
     D            A           E            A 
For sinking your sorrows and raising your joys 
             E                       A            D 
For there's nothing like whiskey to make maidens frisky 
    D         A            E            A 
It soon separates all the men from the boys 

       A                          E 
Come guess me this riddle: what beats pipes and fiddle 
       D           A           E 
What's hotter than mustard, and milder than cream? 
      A                              E 
What best wets your whistle? What's clearer than crystal 
D             A         E             A 
Sweeter than honey, and stronger than steam? 

A                                E 
What can make the dumb talk? What can make the lame walk? 
A                                  E          A 
What's the elixir of life and philosopher's stone? 
    A                   D                  E 
And what helped Mr. Brunel to dig the Thames tunnel? 
      A                     E       A 
Sure wasn't it whiskey from old Innishowen? 

     A           E           A           E 
So stick to the cratur the best thing in nature 
    D             A           E            A 
For sinking your sorrows and raising your joys 
    E                           A           D 
And boys, I'd half wonder if lightning and thunder 
     D             A            E          A 
Was made from the plunder of whiskey me boys
ADVERTISING