The Ideal Husband

	  		
Intro: E G A Am 

E G A Am                E G A Am 
Julian is gonna take my files 
C 
Every woman that I’ve slept with, 
A                Am 
every friendship I’ve neglected, 
C                 
didn’t call when grandma died, 
A                Am           
I spent my money getting drunk and high 
C 
I’ve done things unprotected, 
A              Am 
proceeded to drive home wasted, 
C 
bought things to win over siblings - 
A                Am                 C 
I’ve said awful things, such awful things 

A        Am        C 
and now, now it’s out 

There! 

A       Am 
and now, now it’s out 

E G A Am (x2) 

E G A Am                E G A Am 
Julian, he’s gonna take my files 
C 
Telling people jokes to shut them up, 
A           Am 
resenting people that I love, 
C 
sleep in til two then doing shit, 
A            Am 
just stay in bed and later lie about it, 
C 
obsessing over graying hair, 
A                 Am 
knowing just what people wanna hear, 
C 
binging on unearned attention - 
A               Am                   C 
I’ve said awful things, such awful things 
A        Am       C        
and now, now it’s out 

There! 

A        Am       C 
and now, now it’s out 

C 
I came by at seven in the morning 
A                     Am 
seven in the morning, seven in the morning 
C 
I came by at seven in the morning 
A                  Am 
I said, baby, I’m finally succumbing 
C 
said something dumb like I’m tired of running 
A                 Am 
tired of running, tired of running 
C                  
Let’s put a baby in the oven - 
A                    Am 
wouldn’t I make the ideal husband? 

E G A Am (x4) 

End on E