Soliloquy

	  		Intro: Bm E9 Bm E9  

Bm                          E9                Bm                E9 
I wonder what he'll think of me! I guess he'll call me  old man" 
               D                     A7 D                   A7    D      F#7 
I guess he'll think I can lick ev'ry other feller's father well, I can! 
  Bm                         E9              Bm            E9 
I bet that he'll turn out to be the spittin' image of his dad 
                D                                              
But he'll have more common sense  
           A7 D                A7   D    
Than his pudding headed father ever had 
      Bm                                                                                    
I'll teach him to wrassle, and dive through  
               Bm7                         E9 
A wave when we go in the mornin's for our swim 
      Am                                                                        
His mother can teach him the way to behave,  
         Am7                      B7/13- 
But she won't make a sissy out o' him  
    E7/9-          Am9          D7M  E5-/7 A7+/9- D6 
Not him!    Not my boy!    Not Bill!              Bill! 
G        G6          Am7             D7        G6 G#dim D7 
My boy Bill! I will see that he is named after me, I    will 
G        G6             Am7        D7        G6   Bdim  Am7 
My boy, Bill! He'll be tall and tough as a tree, will   Bill,  
D7       G                       B7                                 
Like a tree he'll grow with his head held high  
         Em                      A9 
And his feet planted firm on the ground 
          D       G7M      D      G6      D      A7      D 
And you won't see nobody dare to try to boss or toss him around! 
D9  G           Am7        G7M      D7             G C6 G C6 G C6 G C6 
No pot-bellied, baggy-eyed bully'll boss him around  
    G           C6           G    C6      
I don't give a damn what he does       
     G         C6          G     C6 
As long as he does what he likes! 
        G          C6      G         C6                 
He can sit on his tail or work on a rail  
        G         C6      Bb       Eb6 Bb Eb6 
With a hammer a hammering spikes! 
       Bb      Eb6       Bb   Eb6       
He can ferry a boat on a river        
   Bb        Eb6        Bb   Eb6    D7           
Or peddle a pack on his back    or work up and down 
     G                        D7                                  
The streets of a town with a whip and a horse  
      G           Gm            A7  
And a hack he can haul a scow along a canal 
 Gm         A7               F#m              Ab7               
Run a cow around a corral or maybe bark for a carrousel  
    F#m                      D7 
Of course it takes talent to do that well 
    G          C6           G      C6             
He might be a champ of the heavyweights  
     G            C6       G     C6 
Or a feller that sells you glue 
    Em7              A7            C        D5-/7      G 
Or President of the United States that'd be all right, too  
Am7                   D7                                  
His mother would like that  
                   G6                               Ddim D7 
But he wouldn't be President unless he wanted to be not  Bill!  
G        G6            Am7           D7       G6    Ddim  Am7 
My boy, Bill! He'll be tall and as tough as a tree, will  Bill! 
 D7     G                        B7                                 
Like a tree he'll grow with his head held high  
         Em                      A9 
And his feet planted firm on the ground 
        D         G      D       G6       D      A7        D 
And you won't see nobody dare to try to boss or toss him around! 
D9 G             Am7           G                 
No fat bottomed, flabby-faced, pot-bellied,  
Am7        G7M         D7       Am7 
Baggy-eyed bastard'll boss him around! 
            Am                                                                          
And I'll be damned if he'll marry the boss'  
            Am7   
Daughter a skinny-lipped virgin with blood like water 
        F6                                                       
Who'll give him a peck and call it a kiss  
     E7         Gm6             G    
And look in his eyes through a lorgnette 
E7    Am                               Am7 Dm    C    E7   Am 
Say, why am I talkin' on like this? My kid ain't even been born, yet! 
F7            F6              F7          F6          
I can see him when he's seventeen or so     
    F7          F6        F7   F6 
And startin' to go with a girl! 
F7             F6                F7          F6       
I can give him lots of pointers, very sound     
       Gb6         Abm6      Gb6 
On the way to get 'round any girl  
F7              F6             F7                               
I can tell him wait a minute! Could it be?  
         Gm7              C7    Am  D9 Am    D9 
What the hell! What if he is a girl?   Bill,    oh Bill   
Am                        D9                                    
What would I do with her? What could  
             Am                    D9 
I do for her? A bum with no money! 
             C                                    
You can have fun with a son,  
        G7 C               G7   C    E7 
But you got to be a father to a girl 
    Am                   D9              Am             D9 
She mighn't be so bad at that a kid with ribbons in her hair! 
          C                      G7 C                              
A kind o' neat and petite little tin-type  
               G7     C    Bb C7 
Of her mother! What a pair,  
I can just hear myself bragging about her! 
F               A7                 Gm                 C7/13 C7 
My little girl pink and white as peaches and cream is she      
F                 Bb            F         Gm         Gm7     C5-/7 C7 
My little girl is half again as bright as girls are meant to be! 
Am7            F     Bb  C7  Am7       F    E7/A  E7     
Dozens of boys   pursue her, many a likely lad  
 A                  Bm9 E7   A7           D7   G7/13 C7 
Does what he can to woo her from her faithful dad  
 F            A7                   Gm                  C7/13  C7 
She has a few pink and white young fellers of two and three 
    F                   Bb            F     G9  F        C7     F 
But my little girl gets hungry ev'ry night and she come home to me! 
   B                  Eb                         
I got to get ready before she comes!  
Bb7M                        Gb           Bbm                                  
I got to make certain that she won't be dragged up in slums 
Bbm7    Gb          Ebm  F        Bb                  Dm    Bb 
With a lot o' bums like  me she's got to be sheltered   and fed and dressed  
Dm     Bb         Dm      Bb    Eb7M       Ebm        Bb        
In the best money    can buy! I never knew how to get money  
Bbdim      F7     Bdim       Bbm F       
But, I'll try, by God! I'll try!       
     Bb       Eb    F       Bb7M            Eb           Bb  Db F7 Bb 
I'll go out and make  it or steal it or take it or die!