Intro: D D D Dsus4 D D2 D2 D (3X) C G/B A5 G And the sign said "Long-haired freaky people need not apply" D A G A So I tucked my hair up under my hat, and I went in to ask him why Bm G He said "You look like a fine, upstanding young man, I think you'll do" D A G A So I took off my hat and said "Imagine that! Huh, me workin' for you!"C G/B A5 G And the sign said anybody caught trespassin' would be shot out on sight D A So I jumped on the fence and I yelled at the house G A "Hey, what gives you the right? Bm G To put up a fence to keep me out or to keep Mother Nature in, D A G A If God was here he'd tell you to your face, "Man you're some kind of sinner!" (Chorus) A Now hey there mister can't you read? G D You gotta have a shirt and tie to get a seat A You can't watch, no you can't eat G D You ain't supposed to be here........ C G D G Sign said you got to have a membership card to get inside...Uhhh! (Instrumental/Solo) C G/B A5 G And the sign said "Everybody welcome, come in, kneel down and pray" D A But when they passed around the plate at the end of it all, G A I didn't have a penny to pay Bm G So I got me a pen and a paper, and I made up my own little sign D A G A It said "Thank you Lord for thinkin' about me, I'm alive and doin' fine!" (Chorus)X2D C G Whoa, signs, signs everywhere a sign D C G Blockin' out the scenery, breakin' my mind D A C D (+intro suspensions) Do this, don't do that, can't you read the sign?