(capo 2ª casa) 

(intro)   C 

C        G          Am        Em 
I like glitter and sparkly dresses. 
F 
But I'm not gonna talk about that 
G 
in my monologue. 
C       G           Am                     Em 
I like baking and things that smell like winter. 
F 
But I'm not gonna talk about that 
G 
in my monologue. 

C 
La la la. La la la. 

C                     G             Am                         Em 
I like writing songs about douchebags who cheat on me. 
F 
But I'm not gonna say that 
G 
in my monologue. 

              C                                   G                            Am             Em 
I like writing their names into songs so they're ashamed to go in public. 
F 
But I'm not gonna say that 
G 
in my monologue. 

( C ) 

C   G  Am   G     F                       G 
La la. La la la la la. This is my musical monologue. 

C                  G                             Am                           Em 
You might think I'd bring up Joe, that guy who broke up with me on the phone. 
F 
But I'm not gonna mention him, 
G 
in my monologue. 

C 
Hey Joe, I'm doing real well! 
G                    Am        Em 
Tonight I'm hosting 'SNL.' 
F 
But I'm gonna brag about that 
G 
in my monologue. 

C 
La la la. Ha ha ha. 
Ha ha ha. Ha ha ha. La la la. 
C                                              G                                   Am          Em 
And if you're wondering if I might be dating the werewolf from 'Twilight.' 
 "Hi Taylor," pisca e manda beijo. 
F 
I'm not gonna comment on that 
G 
in my monologue. 

C   G  Am   G     F                       G 
La la. La la la la la. This is my musical monologue. 

( Am ) 

Am                                                          Em 
You might be expecting me to say something bad about Kanye 
        F 
and how he ran up on the stage and ruined my VMA monologue. 
C                  G                            Am         G                 F 
But there's nothing more to say cuz everything's OK. 
                                         F 
I've got security lining the stage. 

It's my 'SNL' monologue. 
C   G  Am   G    F                       G 
La la. La la la la la. This is my 'SNL' monologue. 
C   G  Am   G     F                       G 
La la. La la la la la. That was my 'SNL' monologue.