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If That Ain't Country Chords

David Allan Coe

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by 99svtgreensnake

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If That Ain't Country

	      D                                             G    
THE OLD MAN WAS COVERED WITH TATOOS AND SCARS, HE GOT SOME IN PRISON AND SOME IN THE BARS. 
    A                                           D    
THE REST HE GOT WORKIN' ON OLD JUNK CARS IN THE DAY TIME. 
     D 
THEY LOOKED LIKE TOMBSTONES IN OUR YARD 
      G                      A                D   
AND I NEVER SEEN HIM WHEN HE WASN'T TIRED AND MEAN. 


   D                                  G 
HE SOLD USED PARTS TO MAKE ENDS MEET, COVERED WITH GREASE FROM HIS HEAD TO HIS FEET, 
A                                           D 
CUSSIN' THE SUN AND THE TEXAS HEAT, AND THE SKEETERS. 
        D  
AND THE NEIGHBORS SAY WE LIVE LIKE HICKS, 
         G                    A         D   
BUT THEY BRING THEIR CARS FOR PA TO FIX ANYHOW. 


       D                                   G 
HE WAS VET'RIN PROUD, TRIED AND TRUE, HE'D FIGHT TILL HIS HEART WAS BLACK AND BLUE, 
A                                         D  
DIDN'T KNOW HOW HE'D MAKE IT THROUGH, THE HARD TIMES. 
D 
BOUGHT OUR HOUSE ON THE G.I. BILL,  
       G                   A              D 
BUT IT WASN'T WORTH ALL HE HAD TO KILL TO GET IT. 


         D                                      G 
HE DRANK PEARL IN A CAN AND JACK DANIELS BLACK, CHEWED TOBACCO FROM A MAIL-POUCH SACK, 
A                                          D    
HAD AN OLD DOG THAT WAS TRAINED TO ATTACK, SOMETIMES. 
D 
HE'D GET DRUNK AND MEAN AS A RATTLESNAKE,  
          G                    A                     D  
AND THERE WASN'T TOO MUCH THAT HE WOULD TAKE, FROM A STRANGER. 


          G             A              D                            G 
THERE WAS 13 KIDS AND A BUNCH OF DOGS, HOUSE FULL OF CHICKENS AND A YARD FULL OF HOGS, 
A                    G                       D   
SPENT THE SUMMERTIME CUTTIN' UP LOGS FOR THE WINTER. 
G                        A                  D                            G 
TRYIN' LIKE THE DEVIL TO FIND THE LORD, AND WORKIN' LIKE A NIGGER FOR MY ROOM AND BOARD, 
A                                                                             D  
COAL BURNIN' STOVE, NO NATURAL GAS, AND IF THAT AIN'T COUNTRY, I'LL KISS YOUR ASS. 


D             G                          D    
IF THAT AIN'T COUNTRY, IT'LL HAIRLIP THE POPE, 
              G    A                    D 
IF THAT AIN'T COUNTRY, IT'S A DAMN GOOD JOKE. 
              G          A        D            G  
I'VE SEEN THE GRAND 'OLE OPRY AND I MET JOHNNY CASH, 
                  A                       D 
AND IF THAT AIN'T COUNTRY, I'LL KISS YOUR ASS. 


      D                                        G 
WELL, MOMMA SOLD EGGS AT THE GROCERY STORE, MY OLDEST SISTER WAS A FIRST-RATE WHORE, 
A                                             D 
DAD SAYS SHE CAN'T COME HOME ANY MORE, AND HE MEANS IT. 
D 
MA JUST SITS AND KEEPS HER SILENCE 
G                      A                        D 
SISTER SHE LEFT 'CAUSE DAD GOT VIOLENT, AND SHE KNOWS IT. 


D                                          G   
MOMMA SHE'S OLD, FAR BEYOND HER TIME, FROM CHOPPIN' TOBACCO 
                          A                                                      D   
AND I SEEN HER CRYIN WHEN BLOOD STARTED FLOWIN' FROM HER CALLOUSED HANDS, AND IT HURT ME. 
D 
BUT SHE'D JUST KEEP WORKIN' TRYIN' TO HELP THE OLD MAN,  
         G                  A               D  
FROM THE END OF ONE ROW AND BACK AGAIN,LIKE ALWAYS. 


      D                                                         G 
SHE'D BEEN THROUGH HELL SINCE JUNIOR WENT TO JAIL, AND WHEN THE LIGHTS GO OUT SHE AIN'T NEVER FAILED, 
   A                                          D   
TO GET DOWN ON HER KNEES AND PRAY, 'CAUSE SHE LOVES HIM. 
D 
SHE TOLD ALL THE NEIGHBORS HE WAS OFF IN THE WAR, 
G                          A                           D  
FIGHTIN' FOR FREEDOM, HE'S GOOD TO THE CORE, AND SHE'S PROUD. 


D                                                 G  
OUR PLACE WAS A GRAVEYARD FOR AUTOMOBILES, AT THE END OF THE PORCH WERE 4 STACKS OF WHEELS, 
    A                                   D 
AND TIRES FOR SALE FOR A DOLLAR OR TWO, CASH. 
  

          G                 A 
THERE WERE 50 HOLES IN THAT OLD TIN ROOF. 
D                    G  
ME AND MY FAMILY WAS LIVIN' PROOF, 
   A 
OF PEOPLE WHO FORGOT ABOUT POOR WHITE TRASH 
                                         D 
AND IF THAT AIN'T COUNTRY I'LL KISS YOUR ASS. 


D             G                          D    
IF THAT AIN'T COUNTRY, IT'LL HAIRLIP THE POPE, 
              G    A                    D 
IF THAT AIN'T COUNTRY, IT'S A DAMN GOOD JOKE. 
              G          A        D            G  
I'VE SEEN THE GRAND 'OLE OPRY AND I MET JOHNNY CASH, 
                  A                       D 
AND IF THAT AIN'T COUNTRY, I'LL KISS YOUR ASS. 


	  

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